EL FLESH

[mo123813]

Nice mini collection!

[ken]

"Well sorry for the bad focus; I was trying different things with my camera this time - looks like I'm going back to auto settings..."
Says The Flesh.......You sure it wasn't the spiced rum?? it can do that to some people. Good to see my man Zebs holding his own once more. Great pictures & scenario.

[el_flesh]

He delivered the killing blows several times this go.
The pics looked great on the camera, set to ISO 400 and Tungsten lighting, with no flash.
When they were reviewed on the comp screen later, though...ugh!
A couple of pix were untouched later; that's where the base dungeon tiles appear to be blue - in reality they are green; just like in the touched up pix!

It took me about 4 hours yesterday to make that post! What with down/up loading pix, retouching them, typing out the notes I'd written during the game in pencil...then figuring
out which pix went with the notes!

Geez. I must really love these games to immortalize them in cyberspace.

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The minis will ALL need their bases ripped off and replaced with smaller square ones! AAAIIGGGHHH!!!!!

[ken]

Nice mini collection!

Is this Beernuts' lunch box?

[el_flesh]

After the last mission, we leave the ruins - and are faced with an Imperial Garrison. The commander thanked us for at least cleaning out and saving the castle if not the village. He tells us "Rest assured - the ragtag forces that you faced will be countered with the might and power of the imperial army. sniff." He tells us also that we should go back to the Imperial City of RODIN for some well-deserved rest. With that he turns around as if we don't exist and starts barking orders to his men.

In the Imperial City I go to report what we found, while the rest go shopping. I find that I cannot even meet with Mental; but am instead ushered into the governor's office. The governor conveys Mental's regrets that he could not meet us: "I believe he is on an imperial assignment of some importance, but my orders are to offer you all the hospitality of my keep." There will be a ball in our honor later, and so we should rest for it, and, especially SHOWER. Seeing as it is free food and booz, Georgeous and Korisu are all for it, while I could not care less. As the guests are being frightened by my skeletons, I am asked to leave 30 mins into it anyways, which I am glad to have an excuse to do.



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But we are wakened by the sound of alarm bells, and see people running in panic all about the halls as we poke out our noses to see what the ruckus is. Sadly, it is not "Girls Gone Wild XXIII", but instead we hear the noise of steel on steel. It can only mean one thing.



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Georgeous goes out to investigate and he finds ORCS! Having gone to sleep drunk and in his full armor and woken up the same way, he attacks his hated enemies immediately. When the Orc attacks Georgeous, he counters it – but he is still drunk from the party and his axe whips thru the air where the Orc’s arm was; a total miss.



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There is no waking Korisu, who is sitting on the john in a tequila coma, having at least his pants down so he didn’t soil himself, and also having barfed into the bathing pool in front of him, thereby saving his life from alcohol toxicity.



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Georgeous meanwhile has been fighting the Orcs far ahead of everyone else - he has managed to cut the arm off the Orc he initially missed. But they attack him again. This time, his counter on the second Orc gets him another arm! There are now two uni-arm Orcs! Ninja has meanwhile taken my soulstone dagger and gathered a second soul for me with it. He has a special attack using daggers, and so he is the perfect candidate to use it. For Georgeous attack turn, he aims at the face of the last Orc, and cuts off its other arm. It dies of shock. Georgeous picks up both the arms and slaps it in the face anyway, bipbipbip - "Why are you slapping yourself?!? Why are you slapping yourself?!?" The Orc with the bow cannot even miss and hit his own men! His dismal-roll arrow hits the ceiling! He puts his bow behind his back in shame and draws a sword instead. Ninja's double wield kills another Orc - but not using my dagger! Dammit. Georgeous scratches an Orc then solid hits him. He breaks its nose, bang, and probably its jaw. Ninja sidesteps an attack. Georgeous gets a scratch on his armor.



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Korisu meanwhile, is in a Tequila Coma - I can't even wake him. (He wasn't there that night..probably really in a Tequila Coma...)



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Now it becomes a party as Orcs shove into the hall!



Ninja kills another Orc - my dagger has three souls stolen now! He kills another Orc that damaged his armor, but not using the dagger. Georgeous kills the spear-holding Berzerk Orc. Ninja dodges an arrow with a flip. An Orc scrapes the wall instead of hitting Georgeous. Zebs hits an Orc hunter with two cuts. Ninja dual wields and now has four stolen souls. Georgeous kills the *lemony goodness* out of an Orc with his ax winding up embedded in the wall behind it!
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I run back towards Korisu, realizing there could be a two-prong invasion. He is missing! Did they drag him away?



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I race off in the other direction, while Ninja is shouting to me to come guard his ass while he searches for treasure! Damn I should have extended my skeleton animation range!



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Ninja searches the dead body; the DM, Beernut tells him that he needs TWELVE to find anything on it. His bonuses give him a total of SIXTEEN! ha! He finds 250Cu.



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Georgeous and Zebs have run forward. Georgeous was unable to open the locked door near him, and said "fraggle it" and ran on...he sees the main castle door broken in...finds a big dark pit that reeks of garbage. He knows he probably cannot jump it, and being alot more sober after fighting, he uses the magic projection of his ax to hit the door - it cuts the door, but that is all. He also says "fraggle it". Zebs, however, has a leap that can cover three squares.



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Meanwhile, I have found the governor - he is now a "Table d'Hote" main dish for the creatures eating his FLESH. Rosbif! (that's a pun in french - they're eating raw "roastbeef".)



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Orcs pour through the front doorframe and attack Georgeous! He gets a cracked rib from the attack! We are all split up yet again, nevermind that the castle design facilitates this! Zebs almost blind himself, comes out of the dark and bumps into an Orc, then swings on instinct.The Orc has a perfect defense roll of 3 shields, but Zebs roll of 7 skulls bounces on the shield, breaking its wrist, and smashes its head open. He says "Did yoo MISZ me?! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"



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Ninja, meanwhile, FAILS his search of the cabinet with a roll of snake eyes! CLICK!!!



He drops down a pit for 1 dmg, his turn is done, he must climb out next turn, and loses 1 defense die for the next four turns.
Georgeous has buried his axe in an Orc's chest. He cuts both legs off another.
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Yours truly, El Flesh, raises a mage, that gets WARP ALLIES as a spell - rolls 4 minor Skeletons and 1 minor Zombie



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Now nasty things come thru the front doorframe. A large Ogre picks up Georgeous and slams him on the wall for one damage. Zebs takes 4 damage from an Orc hero. Meanwhile there has been no damage to my army at all.



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Zebs now makes a five skull hit on the hero...making it bleed...and making it angry! Its four skull hit is defended. Georgeous is desperate; pinned on the wall, he has no choice but to throw his Artifact lightning axe. It kills two Orcs and the legless Orc Zombie outright; and it hurts the others alot. He cleaves the head off the Ogre holding him to the wall - at the perfect height!
Zebs takes two more damage and KILLS the hero! He kills the last Orc, splitting it in two from head to crotch, leaving a pit in the stone floor.



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Ninja finds a bastard sword of reaching, and I find nothing special. Looks like I am in temporary command of the castle, as my attempt to raise the dead governor as a zombie for a very entertaining political statement to the castle population fails.



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I miss my house.

[el_flesh]

We start more or less where we had left off. Zebs looks out of the broken main door - the city is smoking in multiple places, and there are some Orcs. He sees garbage down in the pit "mmmm...I'm saving that for later - don't touch it."

Korisu wakes up with a splitting headache, and there is barf all down the shelf. He has a hangover. "Ehhhhh - ano, best thing for a hangover is DRINK!" So he drinks some more O-Sake.



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He runs bare-assed down the hall, right past the rooms, into the receiving area for the Governor's office and sees my skels inside. They appear to be three times as many to him. My skels, for their part, wonder what the hell is the redness in puddle of offal from Korisu, thinking that he will probably be joining them in the not too distant future as a revenant if he keeps living this way.



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Sunshine arrives at the main doors - she has been stalking and scouting for days outside the castle, sneaking in to join her friends, knowing that she couldn't take on the hordes alone. Korisu runs and looks into the garbage pit.
Beernut: "The smell is atrocious."
Korisu: "I don't care - I'm drunk!"

Georgeous smashes the door, and loosens it. Pebbles finishes the job, smashing it inward. Stairs go down. Ninja splinters the door near him, which Korisu decides to smash into. BANG it flies open - he sees the banquet room that he made a fool of himself in some time ago as he stumbles into it and falls on the floor. Checking the table that hadn't been cleaned, he manages to put together a bottle of O-Sake from the remnants of several glasses' dregs. He drinks that right away. Beernut will decide the effects of so much drunkenness later when battle ensues.



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Ninja searches in the hall. The dice are rolling when I, El Flesh say: "Snake eyes, CLICK!" sure enough...the roll turns up snake eyes!
He shouts curses and accusations of evil alliances for about a minute before it is determined that the wandering monster attack causes him all of 1 body point in damage.
Sunshine bounces an arrow off of it. Georgeous sees the arrow fly, hears Ninja cursing, but goes off down the hall intrepidly, ignoring his crap.



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He comes to a door and body smashes it, blasting it open. There is a guy in the back cell, calling himself Oranguchang, a Dedicated, which is a fighting monk-type class. As a half-orc, Georgeous is leery of him, but he does look alot more human than orc.
He explains that he was tasked by his master to get MORE beer, since Georgeous was drinking prodigal amounts; but was ambushed on his way out and thrown in the cell for later "information gathering" on the whereabouts of Mental. There is a man in the far cell, almost dead, covered in blood and quivering; his joints all dislocated. He has been on the rack.



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Korisu attacks the Orc Marauder, but a double six roll means the alcohol from before has ZERO effect on him! In fact the perfect 12 adds two attack dice in striking this creature, which falls immediately as Korisu runs by it! "Beepu! Beepu!"
Ninja, looking for secret doors almost autofails again with a 3.

Georgeous body checks the prison door (instead of looking for , I dunno, um...a KEY??) because he is still fuzzy. HE rolls snake eyes!
DM, Beernut: "For some reason, you decide to hit the doors headfirst."
Georgeous: "Ya, but I got a helmet!"
Beernut: "And it barely protects you from scrambling your brains. You bounce off the door and fly into the bars on the other side of the room. One damage on your NECK absorbing the blow!"
Since he has some action left, he searches in the pool of water while washing his face. Flesh consults his skel mage. "What an idiot." I find the key on the table outside the dungeon. Oranguchang just sits in his cell, shaking his head. "Hoooo boy..." Korisu still leering, zooms right by with his speed boots, grabbing the key, and trying to open the door. But he must make a mind roll since he is drunk. He drops the key on the floor and has to pick it up, basically using all his actions to make several attempts at getting it in the hole (Beernut: "That's what she said!"), and it finally unlocks. He vomits on the feet of Oranguchang since it required so much concentration.



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Georgeous grabs the key from the lock, and opens the other cell. The other guy, barely alive, looks familiar to him. He decides to put the guy out of his misery; one skull would do it and he gets FIVE.
"I hit him with the flat of my axe, and I paint the cell wall with his brains."

I wanted to talk to him first, maybe torture him myself, but Georgeous didn't listen when I wanted him to wait...I find that he has been magically blocked; I cannot glean any information from what remains at all. I wonder why the monsters would magically block him, and who he was, being familiar to Georgeous. I can't even raise him as a zombie since his brains are already splattered.

Oranguchang washes his feet off in the pool. We look outside and see some guards that are wounded; they are shoring up the main entrance to the outer castle which is being banged on. Ninja finds a secret door in the prison, goes through it, and teeters on the edge of a pit. He tries to backpedal into the room, but fails his body check roll, so he falls into the pit. He sees spikes as he is falling, and winds up taking three damage! Sunshine falls into the pit, taking SEVEN damage and reducing her to ZERO body points - she collapses from loss of blood! We have only a few turns to revive her before she DIES.



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Georgeous bashes the door in front of him, and it blows up on him, dealing SIX damage. This adventure is rapidly becoming a hazard course that is doing more damage than monsters have been lately!
Oranguchang falls in to the pit himself, while Ninja heals Sunshine. Flesh now has nothing to do, so, a bit too late, I bid three of my skeletons to hold onto each other, making a bone bridge down into the pit; so that we can walk into it avoiding the spikes and climb up the other side. Oranguchang, however, rejects my long bone, saying "What's the point of Flesh's boner?" and he climbs out the other side.



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Going into the room, Korisu finds a lot of furniture, and two constructs; one of them the Golem guard of Mental! They turn, and Korisu is attacked by the BioShock one!



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When it attacks Georgeous, he takes one damage on a FIVE shield roll! Zebs dents the BioChoc! We realize that his two autohits are autodefended! Next Oranguchang attacks the BioChoc - which is no problem, because his regular training includes punching rocks! (Almost like in real life...BAFF boom...heh heh heh.) Korisu dents the BioChoc twice. Sunshine heals Ninja fully - who had one body point left. Georgeous stuns the other construct for 4 actions.



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My skel cavalry arrives. Sadly, they do minimal damage on the constructs. Zebs removes an arm from the BioChoc. Oranguchangs flurry of four dice attack four times does no damage. Korisu does an eight damage attack and kills it. Then he turns to the guard and dents it too. Ninja fails to harm it - three hits, three defense.



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Sunshine skill rolls to shoot an arrow from in back; it goes "pink" on its metal hide. Georgeous' shield bash knocks it down again! The guard simply cannot get up. Gold Skel attack makes a hole in it, as does Korisu's 7 skull attack. We realize that though the BioShock attacked us, this guard didn't. It's still stunned for two turns. I want to stop attacking it and let it up - it might have some information for us. After alot of arguing, Georgeous swings anyway. Bang! He caves its face in! A shield bash finishes it off, and it no longer moves.



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My 12 roll finds it extremely well constructed, but I can find no other clues or information in it. Ninja, true to form today, rolls a THREE searching the chair, thus narrowly avoiding Korisu's prediction: "CLICK - you sit on an automated strap-on chair." The desk has a secret compartment, containing a potion of 'invulnerability', which adds 3 autoshields for three turns. (See how 'invulnerable' THAT is when facing a DRAGON!) its value is an incredible 10000 Ag.
He also finds a letter, nicely sealed in wax by Beernut for this moment!



He finds ANOTHER invulnerability potion, AND an artifact, the EAGLE'S GREAT HELM OF PSYCHEDELIC VISIONS. +1 mind; ranged weapons get +5 to their range (hellooo Sunshine!) and +10 to vision - making Sunshine far outstrip all of us with 25 vision range total! Ninja checks the desk now; it has a Barbed Spear of Lightning, and the table has a medium potion of healing.There are no secret doors.

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Georgeous runs ahead to find a lizardman horde! There is more commotion from behind them! He bashes one lizard aside. I make another boner bridge. Georgeous is attacked now, and his excellent defense allows a counter - it splits open the Fimir's belly, its guts coiling out onto the floor. Zebs runs right through, not even noticing my boner, and Korisu does the same. Sunshine spends some Chi and runs ahead, doing some damage with her arrows.



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Georgeous kills a Fimir, but is now blocking the door. Sunshine, however, can shoot over his dwarf ass. Georgeous removes the Fimir's legs at the knee. My army finally arrives, just as we break for a two week hiatus.



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Man, We are such JUNKIES to hate having to take a week off. I look forward to our weekend games as much as I look forward to training!

[ken]

"It took me about 4 hours yesterday to make that post! What with down/up loading pix, retouching them, typing out the notes I'd written during the game in pencil...then figuring
out which pix went with the notes!

Geez. I must really love these games to immortalize them in cyberspace."

It must be a "Labour of Love", Flesh, considering the amount of feed-back that you don't get! Are there really so few of us who enjoy your efforts

[el_flesh]

Alot of lurkers read this, including the guys who play the game with me!!!

It is just brave KEN who posts his thoughts on it!
Last Saturday was coldcuts...man....who needs to go to a sandwich joint like "Dagwood's" when you can make SUPERIOR sandwiches with all kinds of ingredients during a break after playing for 2 hours?!?
I had Roast Beef and Capicolli (I didn't include the available Black Forest Ham!) in a BAKED bun with mustard, BLUE CHEESE, some preserved HOT mushrooms and red pimento pepper!!! While I could have easily stuffed myself with two more of these, ONE was plenty enough to fill a grown man for dinner! Had about three beers...and some wine!

phooo I love weekends at Beernut, Zeb and Gill(ty)'s.

[ken]

You mention "Capicolli " , Flesh, a word I haven't met before, so I looked it up! A form of cured meat, or sausage. Well, being a sausage fan, I looked further, and found I cannot seem to buy it in UK, nearest, to my mind, is the French "Saucisson". This is very tasty, do you get it in USA ??

[el_flesh]

No idea, as it simply means 'sausage' to me. Trust me. The New World is the frikkin CENTER of processed meats! Europe might have cheese, but the sheer variety of Ethnic foods in major cities has to be seen to be believed.
"Smoked Meat" sandwich completely and utterly blows "Corned Beef" out of the water.
You can even have a 'Steamie' "Hot Dog" which is basically made of "processed meat products" (i.e., lips and *Play-Doh Factories*, another thing we call them) and you will swear it is one of the best things you have tasted, for a fast and simple lunch.
Fried Baloney. Piment Loaf. Portuguese OR Italian HOT sausage. Take your pick.

Man, you can even get alot of international restaurants. I had a Lebanese steak once that started to marinate my TONGUE! ooooo that was delicious!